Princess mononoke MV

Hauntingly mesmerising and intimately touching music that encumbers your heart

Qing ming!

6.40am - Caltex stop over for breakfast (not mine)















7.13am - Bukit Timah















7.40am - Sunrise over CCK cemetary















8.40am - CCK columbarium

Warrou...

Crap! !@#$%^&& I have Sauropods doing break dance in my head as I type this entry....times have changed. I can't drink alcohol without having a throbbing headache.

I'm ashamed to say, i'm done in by a pint of Kilkenny and half a glass of whiskey coke. warrou! pathetic leh...

really really crap. Arghz!! 杀了我吧！

人间

今晚你在MSN突然跟我说了那一番话，起头吓到了我。 惊讶的问了你几句之后，才发现原来事情是如此。心也安定了下来。 关于你这件事情，刚好想起了这首歌， 就把它 “点波“ 给你听。take heart.




风雨过后不一定有美好的天空
不是天晴就会有彩虹
所以你一脸无辜不代表你懵懂

不是所有感情都会有始有终
孤独尽头不一定惶恐
可生命总免不了最初的一阵痛

但愿你的眼睛只看得到笑容
但愿你流下每一滴泪都让人感动
但愿你以后每一个梦不会一场空

天上人间如果真值得歌颂
也是因为有你才会变得闹哄哄
天大地大世界比你想像中朦胧
我不忍心再欺哄但愿你听得懂

但愿你会懂该何去何从

谢了！

又高又苗条的杯子。 美！

易碎的玻璃杯， 你一定是花了不少心思，小心翼翼的把它安全的从美国带回来新加坡坡吧。为了表示我衷心的感谢， 我以这篇日记， 跟你说一声 谢了。

真的谢了。 =)

Memories...what memories!

We were taught from young, that we should all study hard and get good grades, so that we can get into good schools and subsequently into university. In universitym, we can pursuit a good degree and land ourselves a good job in a huge MNC. And life will be a bed of roses.

Yeah, right.

True, getting a good degree may laud you a respectable job in an MNC. That as much is true. Period. Beds of roses have thorns too you know? No one ever tells you the naked truth.

Profit.

The word that makes this world economy churn with glee. So, what's with profit?

Simple.

Assume, if one worker needs one day to complete one job, and each job you earn $X dollars, so, the more workers you have, you earn $X * no of workers(N) per day. Great.

Now, revenue is defined as the following:

revenue per day = KXN

where K = loading factor.

This loading factor(K) is the amount of extra work you load on the worker per one day to drive up revenue while he/she receives the same amount of pay.

Now,
profit= Revenue - salary per day (Y)
profit= KXN - Y

*assume COGS = salary/day

From this linear equation, take X & N to be constant. That will mean that to increase profit, you have to either increase K or decrease Y. However, you cannot cut your employees salaries based on whims and fancies, hence you can only logically increase K.

Now, as you increase K, for large MNCs, it's 101% certain that some MNCs don't care a hoot about whether you go hungry due to working longer hours, sacrificing sleep, friends and social life. Nope. In fact, they make it seem like it's the culture to work longer hours and soon enough, it IS the culture. When that happens, your K will increase naturally and everyone, thinking it is the norm, will not look for an increase in Y.

Bottomline? Employees are brainwashed into working drones while the employer laughs his/her way to the bank with a fat load of profit.

Now tell me. After going through countless exams in your youth to get to your dream job. What have you really obtained in benefit after all that hard work? more hard work?

Do think about it. What have you sacrificed, lost or regret not doing in your life while you are slogging away for your employer's profit?

Remember, we all have an equal time on this earth.

I'll leave this open.

See la! Say la say! really kenna this time!

warrou! i don't care this is not a chinese posting cos I wanna comprain!! Never drive car until so 辛苦 before one...argghz!!!

Gradient = 0.2 average.... if only count the last 2 hours, it's 1.2! considering the scale limiting factor, it means die la!!!

where got like that one?? upshift and upshift...later over increase RPM and explode how??!?!?

But heng, got sweet and nice 菊花 on apex.

狗真的是男人的好搭档！

可爱的小狗可以吸引到美女！带它到东海岸公园，果然是一个好的搭档。。。 ：）

其实已经好久没有散步了。。。今天可以在阳光普照的下午吹着海风，陪着小狗一起散一散心，真的开心。狗虽然不会和你有语言上的勾通，但你只是要看着它那无忧无愁的在草地上兴奋的跑着，心情自然的会开心起来。

要开心，也有简单的方法。















跑累了，就休息一会儿。。。

路途。。。

大 苍 凡 无 欲 未 小 光
地 鹰 事 奈 将 满 犊 阴
辽 终 过 忧 革 世 渐 转
阔 翱 慎 感 新 事 晓 眼
唯 翔 且 心 废 欠 处 度
其 青 忌 底 俗 公 事 七
观 天 惮 怯 套 允 道 载

Break from regular transmission (chinese medium)

I know what you want. But I cannot give you what you want. Because I am not you. You network the complains, you can be unhappy, you can even get angry at me for what it is worth. But I am not you. You still will not get what you seek.

I have my own ideas, my own unique perspective on things. You said there is no clear line in the things we do. I agree. Then agree to disagree like I did.

I maintain the semblance of peace because cooperation in any form is better than wrangling at each other's neck. I agree for peace's sake. Honestly, I'm losing my patience because this takes 2 hands to clap and you are oblivious to what is happening.

I'm tired. I wish i didn't know what is going on. But I do.

"I know I'm not one of your favourites but I could use some help here"
~ John Constantine

由衷之言

六年了。。。认识你已经有六年了。。。 说短不短， 说长也不长。这六年来，你所付出的， 你所牺牲的，我都看到了。感动。非常的很。只是藏在心里,没把真心讲出口罢了。。。

你知道吗。。。你对我的信心， 都比我给自己的信心来的高。关于我的能力，你给的信心，都比我自己， 都比所有的人给的高。遗憾的是，我只怕自己力不从心，辜负了你所相信的一切。 但是，我给你的诺言就此；

你一天没把这颗心给放下，我就一天不会放下你对我的信心。

这六年来， 你所教过我的，是好是坏，我尝试过了。。。虽然失去了我六年前天真无知的那个我， 我总觉得，所得回的，超越了我所失去的。这样不好吗？

不可思议的是， 在这人海茫茫当中， 你和我的生路就这样，莫名其妙有了相交。开心，真的开心。。。我真的真的希望到时候，你的选择是对的。 希望你不是把鸡看成老鹰， 因为鸡是永远飞不高的。。。我的心，凤或许是没有，但老鹰肯定有.

长途的路程之中，就算全世界的人不相信我， 我知道只要有你这个哥相信我，就可以了。。。

炸鱼片不新鲜的。。。

“auntie...可以给我一碗鱼片米粉吗？" 我对着auntie 说。。。

“你要哪一种鱼？ 新鲜 的鱼 好吗?" 她说着。。。

我给了一个很奇怪的表情，说了， “auntie, 你有卖不新鲜的鱼 吗？“

她 接着,指了摊子上的招牌说, “炸鱼片 lor….“

啊。。。 原来炸鱼片的鱼不是新鲜的。。。

就是这样子吧。。。

一个不是人说我写的华文字母有错别字。。。 啊。。。 低促有错别字。。。 那么，我就此从现在开始，用华文写出我的blog entries, 之到我可以写成一段无有错别字的写作。

第一次

累了。。。 真的累了。。。

这几个月来见过的， 尝试过的，我累了。。。

原来生活上最复杂，最难搞得就是人以人之间的关系。

我看累了。。。很想不去管，很想把心上所想的，看的，感觉的，都把它仍一边。。。

可惜，我办不到，也不能不管。

阵面的也好，反面的也好，是假是真，看透了，真的真的疲倦。。。

简简单单的过一生， 很难吗？

Revelation

Look to the North on the 7th day at dusk.

Look for the white rose.

The Harbinger of the end of ends.

Loss is never lost.

It was a simple task. To help take photos of her. In her buddist robe.

So I obligingly did. In fact, I took a couple of shots. I have always loved photography. The challenge of taking a good photo is to convey your intented emotions to the person viewing your photographs. So I did my best, played around with the lighting until I get the shots I wanted.

Satisfied, I showed her the picture. She looked pleased. While packing my camera, she said to me, "Use this photo you have taken for my funeral." My heart froze. But I managed to utter a casual "orh." And I have never mentioned the whole event to anyone since.

And so.... 1.5 years down, that was how my first public work induced emotions. The big photo frame. The urn. My close relatives' wallets. They carry with them my work of that day. It is a beautiful photo, they still say.

But it is beautiful not because of my technical skills, but, of the bonding and love between us. Love made the portrait beautiful.

I have never dared looked at the photo ever since. It was conveniently forgotten, buried in time. And I know why.

Loss is never lost.

V-day / Friendship-day/chop-carrot-day is here....

Ok...to all you lovey-dovey birds out there (notice the tinge of envy?), here's a nice lomentic song for ya all....




相爱

同恩 范逸臣

词曲:黄舒骏

(男)他们告诉我爱是个恶魔
要你一颗心还你一场空
我们的爱与众不同
推翻他们的胡说
爱上之前我懵懵懂懂
现在我明白我生的理由
原来我已睡了很久
是用爱叫醒我

(女)你要我什么你爱我怎么
只让你拥有我的完美
我的娇柔我的悸动
你要我什么你爱我怎么
只要说出口我的深情
我的不悔我的执著
都是你的

(男)做什都对说什都感动
天地都有情连山水都温柔
爱对了什都不愁
别人为何都不懂
牵着你的手我什都不求
抱你在怀中一生就已足够
不管是天堂是宇宙
就是我爱的时候

(女)你要我什么你爱我怎么
只让你拥有我的完美(完美)
我的娇柔(娇柔)我的悸动(悸动)
你要我什么(有的全部都要给我)
你爱我怎么(我爱的每一个动作)
只要说出口(我已经无法说的尽)
我的深情
我的不悔(不悔)
我的执著(执著)
都是你的(都是的)

(合)你要我什么你爱我怎么
只让你拥有
我的完美(的完美)
我的娇柔(的娇柔)
我的悸动(悸动)
你要我什么(你有的全部都要给我)
你爱我怎么(我爱的每一个动作)
只要说出口(我已经无法说的尽)
我的深情
我的不悔(不悔)
我的执著(执著)
都是你的(都是的)
都是你的(都是的)

Simple words yet....

...so uplifting! Really. sz, you will never know how encouraging your words meant to me over msn that evening.

Now you know...it's enough for me to delicate this posting to you...though one day late(busy mah!)

=p

Struggle

"One....more....time....."

He feebly attempted to drag his own near-lifeless body across the scorching sand as the sun's heat shone relentlessly on him from high above the cloudless sky. His nerves burst forth signals of pain as his parched skin scraped across the coarse sand.

Raw skin and rough sand does not mix, it seems. Every single movement draw forth fresh abrasions from the tender flesh, staining the sand with his blood. Feeling frustrated, he knew this is the end for him. With all the strength he could muster, he delicately turn his head towards the sun.

Two vultures circled lazily high above him. Like an ominous sign of impending doom, the two messengers of death waits patiently for it's prey to come to pass. As if sensing death, they grew more excited, squawking excitely to each other with each passing moment.

Eyes squinting, he whispered a hoarse "Why....me?" into the air, as the shimmering desert heat carries his voice away to nothingness. No one can hear his pain, his disappointment and ultimately, his sadness. Sadness of all the unfulfilled dreams left unaccomplished. Sadness of all the things left unsaid and never will be said. Sadness of never being able to say "I'm sorry" to the one he hurt but hold so dear in his dying heart.....

Turmoil!

The past kept haunting me! I feel it in my dreams, I dwell in it every single minute that I am awake. Every SINGLE minute. GAH! Sometimes I wish I can just switch off that part of the brain. And work of late have been very helpful to work synergistically(don't even know if there is such a word) against me.

On the topic of work, it has been an equally trying period. I kept making errors I felt I should not even have made, in fact, I shouldn't even be making mistakes. Sigh. Where to find that elusive characteristic that I seem to be missing?

This picture taken at 1am on 01/02/07 is proof that work will haunt you if you don't get it right the first time...(actually not really but i'm just trying to make myself feel worse) *sigh*













On a happier but stressful note, tomorrow I will be going for this:















better hope nothing goes wrong tomorrow.