In all my blogging days, I have never ever blogged anything of a serious nature. Most of the entries I had were light hearted, occassionally lame and grammatically messed-up. But nothing serious, dark nor gloomy.
I will change all that today by writing out some of my inner-most thoughts (memory purge) which I have kept to myself since yester-years. Best of all, it might not make sense to most of you. Save two.
It is useless fighting the inevitable. There is not any way I could escape from the situation I am in. In short, I am like a fly trapped in a spider's web. A web of emotions. I have always known that emotions are like ice cream toppings. They make eating the ice-cream a delightful experience. Similarly, emotions allows you to experience a plethodra of happiness, sadness and everything in between. All thrown into the delicious ice-cream we call life. And I had just eaten a sour prune in this ice-cream. I guess that is what makes life balanced. Too much sweet toppings and you will be diabetic in no time. Too much salty or sour toppings makes you prone to kidney failure. But boy, do I hate this sour prune.
I have always thought of myself as a deep ponderer (think stoning) and if I could analyse this sour prune from a cold and logical perspective, I would have known that there can only be one ending. And dealt with it swiftly and decisively at that point in time. Yet I had hesitated. I am not a cold, lifeless machine. I am human afterall. I waited. And waited. And waited. The sour prune was closer. Closer. And now I am eating it. Yummy.
The line must be drawn here. No more emotional weakness. I will remove this sour prune from my mouth as cleanly as a surgeon amputates a limb from a body. I had already done what I needed to do. Now I will go and be at peace with myself.
Aut viam inveniam aut faciam.
P.S: Seriously, i'm not dangling any one's appetite (think chinese?). But seriously, stop guessing. Take it as an interesting read and think nothing of it(I hope I don't sound snobbish, I wrote it because I want to let it out, not irritate anyone). But to the two of you who knows, the only link had been severed. I'll be (try) at peace now.
Saturday, March 25, 2006
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
Big Ships!
These pics were taken outside my mum's office... heh... the boats are at least 3 stories high ....not something you will see often =) these were build by the company my mum's working in...i'll like to have one too...considering it's quite cheap... how cheap? try a BMW 3 series.... the catch? you only get the hull... but with the amount of change left over, i've sure it will get you a decent engine
Okay, this is not a ship but so happened to be a pic of my car taken at cy's place... too bad the background is not the wide open sea or something.... sigh....
Okay, this is not a ship but so happened to be a pic of my car taken at cy's place... too bad the background is not the wide open sea or something.... sigh....
Thursday, March 16, 2006
Damn confusing LEH!!!!
Excerpt from CNA:
January retail sales rise 4.8% year-on-year on subdued car purchases
SINGAPORE : Retail sales in Singapore rose 4.8 percent in January compared with the same period a year ago.
This is according to latest data from the Department of Statistics.
The number was largely in line with expectations.
The muted rise in retail sales was largely because Singaporeans did not rush out to buy big ticket items such as cars.
Minus the car sales figures, retail sales rose 9.7 percent on year in January.
The boost came from higher sales of food and beverages over the Chinese New Year period which fell in that month.
According to the data, supermarkets and department stores reported a roaring trade.
Food and beverage sales rose 34 percent on year in January while department store sales increased nearly 12 percent.
On a seasonally-adjusted basis, retail sales fell 3.9% in January compared with December last year.
================================
I do not know about you guys but this article is really confusing me. Just look at the sentences in bold and you will know what i mean. If we have a drop in retail sales from last december, just say so, dun have to say we are better than last year january or that retails sales is good without car purchases...I mean, after all, we want to know the bottom line, but I think all we are getting is a confusing line.
January retail sales rise 4.8% year-on-year on subdued car purchases
SINGAPORE : Retail sales in Singapore rose 4.8 percent in January compared with the same period a year ago.
This is according to latest data from the Department of Statistics.
The number was largely in line with expectations.
The muted rise in retail sales was largely because Singaporeans did not rush out to buy big ticket items such as cars.
Minus the car sales figures, retail sales rose 9.7 percent on year in January.
The boost came from higher sales of food and beverages over the Chinese New Year period which fell in that month.
According to the data, supermarkets and department stores reported a roaring trade.
Food and beverage sales rose 34 percent on year in January while department store sales increased nearly 12 percent.
On a seasonally-adjusted basis, retail sales fell 3.9% in January compared with December last year.
================================
I do not know about you guys but this article is really confusing me. Just look at the sentences in bold and you will know what i mean. If we have a drop in retail sales from last december, just say so, dun have to say we are better than last year january or that retails sales is good without car purchases...I mean, after all, we want to know the bottom line, but I think all we are getting is a confusing line.
Thursday, March 09, 2006
Zhnnnng my moo-moo : Stage 1
ok. hand itchy. changed my car interior speedometer lights to blue Leds.
I hate this Laptop ( Just dun ask what brand it is)
A brand new laptop which I had my hands on. Clean and fresh off the box. Was going to do a routine installation of the necessary softwares which our department uses, but it was definately not a routine installation.
Firstly, it was plain sailing, managed to join the NUS domain, logged in with my account and prepare to install acrobat prof. from the web shopping, then suddenly, this BOD came up right at the start of the installation. Shit.
Nvm. reboot. BOD. SHiT. reboot. Safe mode. BOD.SHIT SHIT SHIT. reboot. windows recovery.BOD.SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT. Format laptop. reinstalled EVERYTHING. log on with nusnet a/c. Compulsary Trend Micro AV installation. clicked install.
BOD.
!@#$%^&*(&^. STUFF LAPPY BACK INTO BOX.
Saturday, March 04, 2006
Interesting read
Nine ways of marrying the wrong person
By Rabbi Dov Heller, M.A.
1. You pick the wrong person because you expect him/her to change after you're married. The classic mistake: Never marry potential. The golden rule is, if you can't be happy with the person the way he or she is now, don't get married. As a colleague of mine so wisely put it, "You actually can expect people to change after they're married... for the worst!" So when it comes to the other person's spirituality, character, personal hygiene, communication skills, and personal habits, make sure you can live with these as they are now.
2. You pick the wrong person because you focus more on chemistry than on character. Chemistry ignites the fire, but good character keeps it burning. Beware of the "I! 'm in love" syndrome. "I'm in love" often means, "I'm in lust." Attraction is there, but have you carefully checked out this person's character? Here are four character traits to definitely check for:
Humility: Does this person believe that "doing the right thing" is more important than personal comfort? Do I want to be more like this person? Would I like my child to turn out like him or her?
Kindness: Does this person enjoy giving pleasure to other people? How does s/he treat people s/he doesn't have to be nice to? Does s/he do volunteer work? Give charity?
Responsibility: Can I depend on this person to do what s/he says s/he's going to do?
Happiness: Does this person like himself? Does s/he enjoy life? Is s/he emotionally stable? Ask yourself: Do I want to be more like this person? Do I want to have a child with this person? Would I like my child to turn out like him or her?
3. You pick the wrong person because the man doesn't understand what a woman needs most. Men and women have unique emotional needs, and more often than not, it is the man who just doesn't "get it." Jewish tradition places the onus on the man to understand the emotional needs of a woman and to satisfy them. The unique need of a woman is to be loved -- to feel that she is the most important person in her husband's life. The husband needs to give her consistent, quality attention. This is most apparent in Judaism's approach to sexual intimacy. The Torah obligates the husband to meet the sexual needs of his wife. Sexual intimacy is always on the woman's terms. Men are goal-oriented, especially when it comes to this area. As a wise woman once pointed out, "Men have two speeds: on and off." Women are experience-oriented. When a man is able to switch gears and become more experience-oriented, he will discover what makes his wife very happy. When the man forgets about his own needs and focuses on giving his wife pleasure, amazing things happen.
4. You choose the wrong person because you do not share a common life goals and priorities. There are three basic ways we connect with another person:
-chemistry and compatibility
-share common interests
-share common life goal
Make sure you share the deeper level of connection that sharing life goals provide. After marriage, the two of you will either grow together or grow apart. To avoid growing apart, you must figure out what you're "living for," while you're single -- and then find someone who has come to the same conclusion as you. This is the true definition of a "soul mate." A soul mate is a goal mate -- two people who ultimately share the same understanding of life's purpose and therefore share the same priorities, values and goals.
5. You pick the wrong person because you do not have a deeper emotional connection with this person. To evaluate whether you have a deeper emotional connection or not, ask: "Do I respect and admire this person?" This does not mean, "Am I impressed by this person?" We are impressed by a Mercedes. We do not respect someone because they own a Mercedes. You should be impressed by qualities of creativity, loyalty, determination, etc.
Also ask:
"Do I trust this person?" This also means, "Is he/she emotionally stable? Do I feel I can rely on him/her?
6. You pick the wrong person because you choose someone with whom you don't feel emotionally safe. Ask yourself the following questions: Do I feel calm, peaceful and relaxed with this person? Can I fully express myself with this person? Does this person make me feel good about myself? Do you have a really close friend who does make you feel this way? Make sure the person you marry makes you feel the same way! Are you afraid of this person in any way? You should not feel you need to monitor what you say because you are afraid of how the other person will view it. If you're afraid to express your feelings and opinions openly, there's a problem with the relationship.
Be on the look out for someone who is always trying to change you. Another aspect of feeling safe is that you don't feel the other person is trying to control you. Controlling behaviors are a sign of an abusive person. Be on the look out for someone who is always trying to change you. There's a big difference between "controlling" and "making suggestions." A suggestion is made for your benefit; a control statement is made for their benefit.
7. You pick the wrong person because you don't put everything on the table. Anything that bothers you about the relationship must be brought up for discussion. Bringing up the uncomfortable stuff is the only way. To evaluate how well the two of you communicate, negotiate, and work together. Over the course of a lifetime, difficulties will inevitably arise. You need to know now, before making a commitment: Can you resolve your differences and find compromises that work for both of you? Never be afraid to let the person know what bothers you. This is also a way for you to test how vulnerable you can be with this person. If you can't be vulnerable, then you can't be intimate. The two go hand in hand.
8. You pick the wrong person because you use the relationship to escape from personal problems and unhappiness. If you are unhappy and single, you'll probably be unhappy and married, too. Marriage does not fix personal, psychological and emotional problems. If anything, marriage will exacerbate them. If you are not happy with yourself and your life, take responsibility to fix it now while you are single. You'll feel better, and your future spouse will thank you.
9. You pick the wrong person because he/she is involved in a triangle. To be "triangulated" means a person is emotionally dependent on someone
or something else while trying to develop another relationship. A person who hasn't separated from his or her parents is the classic example of triangulation. People can also be triangulated with things as well, such as work, drugs, Internet, hobbies, sports or money. Be careful that you and your partner are free of triangles. The person caught in the triangle cannot be fully emotionally available to you. You will not be their number one priority. And that's no basis for a marriage.
- Now, why isn't such good stuff available everywhere? It will save some heartache.
By Rabbi Dov Heller, M.A.
1. You pick the wrong person because you expect him/her to change after you're married. The classic mistake: Never marry potential. The golden rule is, if you can't be happy with the person the way he or she is now, don't get married. As a colleague of mine so wisely put it, "You actually can expect people to change after they're married... for the worst!" So when it comes to the other person's spirituality, character, personal hygiene, communication skills, and personal habits, make sure you can live with these as they are now.
2. You pick the wrong person because you focus more on chemistry than on character. Chemistry ignites the fire, but good character keeps it burning. Beware of the "I! 'm in love" syndrome. "I'm in love" often means, "I'm in lust." Attraction is there, but have you carefully checked out this person's character? Here are four character traits to definitely check for:
Humility: Does this person believe that "doing the right thing" is more important than personal comfort? Do I want to be more like this person? Would I like my child to turn out like him or her?
Kindness: Does this person enjoy giving pleasure to other people? How does s/he treat people s/he doesn't have to be nice to? Does s/he do volunteer work? Give charity?
Responsibility: Can I depend on this person to do what s/he says s/he's going to do?
Happiness: Does this person like himself? Does s/he enjoy life? Is s/he emotionally stable? Ask yourself: Do I want to be more like this person? Do I want to have a child with this person? Would I like my child to turn out like him or her?
3. You pick the wrong person because the man doesn't understand what a woman needs most. Men and women have unique emotional needs, and more often than not, it is the man who just doesn't "get it." Jewish tradition places the onus on the man to understand the emotional needs of a woman and to satisfy them. The unique need of a woman is to be loved -- to feel that she is the most important person in her husband's life. The husband needs to give her consistent, quality attention. This is most apparent in Judaism's approach to sexual intimacy. The Torah obligates the husband to meet the sexual needs of his wife. Sexual intimacy is always on the woman's terms. Men are goal-oriented, especially when it comes to this area. As a wise woman once pointed out, "Men have two speeds: on and off." Women are experience-oriented. When a man is able to switch gears and become more experience-oriented, he will discover what makes his wife very happy. When the man forgets about his own needs and focuses on giving his wife pleasure, amazing things happen.
4. You choose the wrong person because you do not share a common life goals and priorities. There are three basic ways we connect with another person:
-chemistry and compatibility
-share common interests
-share common life goal
Make sure you share the deeper level of connection that sharing life goals provide. After marriage, the two of you will either grow together or grow apart. To avoid growing apart, you must figure out what you're "living for," while you're single -- and then find someone who has come to the same conclusion as you. This is the true definition of a "soul mate." A soul mate is a goal mate -- two people who ultimately share the same understanding of life's purpose and therefore share the same priorities, values and goals.
5. You pick the wrong person because you do not have a deeper emotional connection with this person. To evaluate whether you have a deeper emotional connection or not, ask: "Do I respect and admire this person?" This does not mean, "Am I impressed by this person?" We are impressed by a Mercedes. We do not respect someone because they own a Mercedes. You should be impressed by qualities of creativity, loyalty, determination, etc.
Also ask:
"Do I trust this person?" This also means, "Is he/she emotionally stable? Do I feel I can rely on him/her?
6. You pick the wrong person because you choose someone with whom you don't feel emotionally safe. Ask yourself the following questions: Do I feel calm, peaceful and relaxed with this person? Can I fully express myself with this person? Does this person make me feel good about myself? Do you have a really close friend who does make you feel this way? Make sure the person you marry makes you feel the same way! Are you afraid of this person in any way? You should not feel you need to monitor what you say because you are afraid of how the other person will view it. If you're afraid to express your feelings and opinions openly, there's a problem with the relationship.
Be on the look out for someone who is always trying to change you. Another aspect of feeling safe is that you don't feel the other person is trying to control you. Controlling behaviors are a sign of an abusive person. Be on the look out for someone who is always trying to change you. There's a big difference between "controlling" and "making suggestions." A suggestion is made for your benefit; a control statement is made for their benefit.
7. You pick the wrong person because you don't put everything on the table. Anything that bothers you about the relationship must be brought up for discussion. Bringing up the uncomfortable stuff is the only way. To evaluate how well the two of you communicate, negotiate, and work together. Over the course of a lifetime, difficulties will inevitably arise. You need to know now, before making a commitment: Can you resolve your differences and find compromises that work for both of you? Never be afraid to let the person know what bothers you. This is also a way for you to test how vulnerable you can be with this person. If you can't be vulnerable, then you can't be intimate. The two go hand in hand.
8. You pick the wrong person because you use the relationship to escape from personal problems and unhappiness. If you are unhappy and single, you'll probably be unhappy and married, too. Marriage does not fix personal, psychological and emotional problems. If anything, marriage will exacerbate them. If you are not happy with yourself and your life, take responsibility to fix it now while you are single. You'll feel better, and your future spouse will thank you.
9. You pick the wrong person because he/she is involved in a triangle. To be "triangulated" means a person is emotionally dependent on someone
or something else while trying to develop another relationship. A person who hasn't separated from his or her parents is the classic example of triangulation. People can also be triangulated with things as well, such as work, drugs, Internet, hobbies, sports or money. Be careful that you and your partner are free of triangles. The person caught in the triangle cannot be fully emotionally available to you. You will not be their number one priority. And that's no basis for a marriage.
- Now, why isn't such good stuff available everywhere? It will save some heartache.
Breakfast at Grand Copthorne Waterfront Hotel
Woke up damn frigging early on Friday as OAR had a CASE event held at the hotel. Reached the place at 7.30am (never ever wake up so damn early since BMT days). Had buffet breakfast (a pity, i was too sleepy to really enjoyed the breakfast)
Well, as you can see, i didn't take much(not that it was nice anyway). Lamb sauage, pork sauage, hash brown, fried salmon with sea salt(no idea what the hell that is. all salt is from the sea.. no?) and a pastry that is quite sweet and refreshing. However, the pineapple juice was a tad too sour(well at least that woke me up... heheh)
The event posters. They had many of such posters there. Too many to count. Actually, I don't think anyone will be so bo-liao as to count them.
The room where i was posted to man the stupid "cybercafe" and where all the participants mingle. Well, at least I got to chat with some of the participants, especially the exotic looking woman from dunno where at the right side of the photo (She is in the middle of 2 women, with one wearing a red blanket :P). Didn't managed to find out where she is from as I was yanked to help in some other stuff !@#$%^&* Ah well, at least we had a nice chat by the window facing the river.
Dinner at West Coast
My friend was returning to Australia so we had a farewell dinner at west coast last Thursday. The only reason why we were there was because of the prawn paste chicken ($8 for 8 pieces). This is probably the beste prawn paste chicken we have ever tasted. We also ordered a veggie (nothing fancy) and a hot-plate chilli squid... yummy!
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